I check the temperature and find that it’s currently 42 degrees. Tonite, my goal is to run 6 miles. It’s the middle run of the three consecutive week running days that my program is calling for. Without the 7 mph wind from the north, I wouldn’t mind so much, but I am really not looking forward to the chill.
My only suggested items this year to my family for Christmas all pertained to running. My parents were nice enough to buy a water belt, which as my sister pointed out, was way too small for my waist. (I didn’t know how to take that once I found out.) My sister was kind enough to get me some gift certificates to purchase the Mumford & Sons album–an artist I hadn’t heard of yet, which was nice. My wife bought me a pair of gloves after I complained about how sensitive they were to the wind.
Armed with layered long sleeve shirts, the gloves, and some cold weather running pants, I laced up the shoes, started the GPS watch I have, fired up the Ipod, and off I went–into the cold.
When I tell people how many miles I am going to run on any given day, I often get some strange looks. Sometimes they’re looks of disbelief (“Did you say you were going to run Six miles?”). Sometimes they’re looks of fascination (“Wow! That’s a long way to go!“). And other times they’re looks of envy (“I could never run that far.”). No matter what, the question I always end up answering goes something like this: “Why?”
To be honest, I don’t really know. Eight years ago, I was eating fast-food twice a day, and going out to the bars 3 times a week. At the time, I figured I could afford to have such an unhealthy lifestyle. My roommate suggested we take advantage of the running loop in front of our apartment complex, and so I did. A quarter-mile in, I had to stop. Eventually, I made it to a mile–and since it was time for New Year’s resolutions, I resolved to complete a marathon.
Yes, it was unrealistic. That goal meant a lot of lifestyle changes–ones that I wasn’t prepared to make sacrifices for. And after deciding that I liked the fast food and bars more than huffing & puffing, I dropped the goal from “New Year’s Resolution” status to “One Day” status.
Over a year ago, I completed a half-marathon, which for me was pretty huge. Unfortunately, I stopped running due to the weather, and began to take a more comfortable approach to life. No, I no longer was eating fast food twice a day, but I certainly wasn’t excersizing either.
That was, until about 6 months ago. After 2 months of being out of a full-time job, I decided that I would use the extra time to do something that could help build my self-esteem. It wasn’t as bad as the first time, (I think I made it just about a mile), but it was something that I could build upon. Week after week, I put on the shorts, laced up the shoes, and grabbed the leashes of my two dogs for a run. What I found was that the effort paid off in building up mileage–and that I actually enjoyed meeting the mileage goals set. At the end of each run, I felt better. My mood was elated, and I had something that I earned through my own determination & work.
The seasons changed, and now it’s cold outside. Just another obstacle that I have to decide to accept or ignore. Over the weekend, I was able to do a 12 mile run. I’m well on pace for the 1/2 marathon my sister has signed me up for in March.
So, why do I do it? I think that I began because I felt it was something that could better myself physically. But now, I do it because I believe that I learn something through the act of running.
Right now, I believe that I’m learning that the things in life that truly mean something aren’t necessarily always handed to you. No one can run 12 miles for me. I have to do that myself, and I couldn’t do that unless I put in the work and make the choices that help me meet that goal. Same in life I guess. I can wish as much as I want for a full-time position, or even several part-time positions–but unless I put in the work to make that happen, I most likely won’t ever get there. I believe that so many of us are living in a world of entitlement expectations–and I for one have begun to realize that I have a lot of work to do in order to drop that from my understanding of what life is all about.
Amazingly, after I had this revelation, I received a phone call for a potential position. It isn’t the greatest position ever–but it’s one in which I will happily accept, knowing that it will be my own effort & attitude that will propel me into one that I like better.
This weekend’s goal is 13 miles. I wonder what I might learn. As I gain some of these insights (or revelations to me), I hope to post them. Happy running.
